Meaningful birthday gift for 10yo (first of series) ?

April 15, 2024 12:25 PM

My niece will be turning 10 shortly and I'd love to start a tradition of gifting her something she might appreciate in her future life for this and, say, eight subsequent birthdays. Any ideas of "timeless" presents that a younger might actually enjoy receiving?

My grandmother starting giving me silver teaspoons which was a bit of a drag but I came to really treasure them. However I'd love to find something less gender specific (not that forks / spoons have gender, but ... you get it, right?) Also I'll be in the same spot with a nephew next year.

Have you given or gotten a series of gifts like this that were winners (or failures)?

Maybe nice editions of classic books? But what's classic, really?

posted by travertina to Shopping (29 answers total)

Maybe this would be better when they're toward the later end of your range, but a good tool set can be extremely useful and will hopefully last forever. I got one from my aunt when I moved away to college (25 years ago) and I still thank her for it every year or so.
posted by number9dream at 12:31 PM on April 15 [9 favorites]

What about a framed family photograph?

We all seem to have photos that make us laugh or "aww..." but they are buried on our phones and nobody takes the time to actually print them out and frame them. Mom and Dad, siblings, family dog, vacation spot etc. You will likely need her parents help in actually getting the right photo. Or you can take it, if needed. Bonus points for getting the same frame for each one (buy them all now).

I would bet that at 18 she will look at those framed photos of her later childhood and really appreciate the memories and time you took to do that for her.
posted by pixlboi at 1:02 PM on April 15 [6 favorites]

For my 10th birthday my grandfather passed me down an old, classic brass telescope with leather trim that was his. I still pull it out once in awhile when I'm headed somewhere scenic but all these years later it's one of the main "focal points" (no pun intended) of my house decor, and I cherish it very much.

Got anything meaningful to hand down?
posted by wats at 1:05 PM on April 15 [5 favorites]

Definitely gendered, but I believe charms for a charm bracelet are a classic for this.

I have a friend whose aunt gifted her nice Christmas ornaments yearly from birth, and she moved out at 18 with enough for a little starter Christmas tree.
posted by Otis the Lion at 1:07 PM on April 15 [21 favorites]

Things you add to would be a good continued gift. Photo album that you add a photo each year, jewelry box and jewelry, toolbox and tools, “hope chest” and household items (whether it’s for college or not after high school). Saving account (or stocks) that you add to, memory box and something from an activity you do together each year.
posted by raccoon409 at 1:09 PM on April 15 [5 favorites]

Recipe book and recipes you make together
posted by raccoon409 at 1:11 PM on April 15 [4 favorites]

OMG number9dream, I came here to suggest a cordless drill. Or a cordless screwdriver - Ryobi has one that's little and very functional.

Other ideas:

- book of poetry (pick this out with her? Get a compendium of different poets?)

- tree planted in her honor

- cool wooden storage box (large, small, whatever - useful, lasts)

- start her tool collection with calipers - measure even tiny things!

- semiprecious or just awesome mineral specimens

- something symbolizing the chemical element that corresponds to her age. For 10, that's neon, which sound like it could be fun - tiny neon light, neon-colored jewelry, a small laser (some are helium-neon gas based), anything that includes a laser

- a deliberately planned experience/memory, then a framed photo or relic that goes with that. Could be learning to make sushi together, volunteering somewhere, etc.

- talk to her about what's important to her, then pick a charity, together, based on those interests and donate $30-ish in her name. You could pick out a single bead, or some other small thing, to serve as a symbol or reminder of this.

- membership in something - a new experience/organization every year
posted by amtho at 1:15 PM on April 15 [3 favorites]

Definitely gendered, but I believe charms for a charm bracelet are a classic for this.

Yes, if she's at least moderately girly, this is it. Charms have come back in a surprisingly big way.

Alternatively, a journal for the year that suits her aesthetics, maybe with a prompt list? She might not use it up every year, but I would be fascinated/mortified to be able to look back now and see what I thought my future would be at one-year intervals of my adolescence, or my best memory of the past year.
posted by praemunire at 1:23 PM on April 15 [2 favorites]

I have had this idea since my kids were born, and will hopefully begin to implement on my older kid's 10th birthday. I don't think it's EXACTLY what you're looking for, but personally I love music and music has been a huge part of my life, so this is the idea:

I wanted to make a playlist that only had songs from the years that important people in the kid's life were also the kid's age, including the kid.

So, kid is turning 10, kid's Mom was born in 1976, a song you love (or Mom loves!) and hope kid will love from 1986 is Fall on Me by R.E.M, that track goes on it. Grandpa was born in 1962, a song he or you love from 1972 is Jackson Browne's Doctor My Eyes, and so on.

A. This is a lot of work.
B. It SHOULD be physical media, in my opinion, which is tricky these days. Who can make a mixtape and be sure the recipient can play said tape? Or CD, even.
C. You have to also love music AND be sure the kid is into it enough to make all the labor is worth it. Tricky!

So....that's the idea.

I also paid a musician I know/love to write a song about my daughter for her birthday. MeMail me and I'll give you the details of the artist, if you'd like, but it's also possible other artists of a certain level could/would do such a thing.

Finally, I do support the idea of a nice tool gift, but you gotta know your audience on that one (which I assume you do). Maybe they craft or do art in a way that those tools -- rather than general household tools -- would be good.

Good luck!
posted by AbelMelveny at 1:24 PM on April 15 [1 favorite]

I should point out that my idea for my daughter was the next year there's another tape/CD/playlist with an 11 year offset -- new artists, new people to base it off (Great Aunt Lucy was born in '31!). I also love love love making mixtape album art, where the person and birthdate would live to the right of the track list and release date/year.
posted by AbelMelveny at 1:27 PM on April 15

Along the lines of tool kits--I think actual tools are a couple years away yet, though y10yomv--a basic sewing kit in a proper little trunk could be great. As a kid I loved anything with little drawers and compartments, and this would land there. Stitching/mending/sewing on a button really are not gendered skills, they're life skills, and whenever I find myself in the position of having to pull out my little sewing kit I am glad to have what I need right there.
posted by wormtales at 1:36 PM on April 15 [3 favorites]

So you're basically deciding on a collectible for someone else, then? I want to suggest something small, like teaspoons, if you must. A few other ideas:
A little ceramic/wooden animal (what's her favorite?) in a different style every year, or anything in a natural theme (bugs, trees, etc)
A nice, small blank journal or notebook with a pen
A piece of very fancy, unusual candy or chocolate (not a collectible, but a nice tradition)
A lunch (doesn't have to be on the birthday itself) at a fancy place, or high tea, something unusual
A visit to a certain special kind of store and a certain amount they can spend there

My godparent gave me a Christmas tree ornament in a series, in a box, every year for like 18-20 years. They were fragile and I didn't have my own tree when I was young, and I finally sold these (I think? Maybe they're still in my basement) at like age 45. Still in the box, never ever used or enjoyed. They were moved by my mom so many times. They were moved by me many times. They were discussed by my mom and me so many times. I don't think I got very much for them, and they didn't really have any meaning for me. I don't even really have a proper Christmas tree now. I didn't take them out of the box when I did have a tree because they weren't my style or taste. This was a big waste of sentiment and storage space and energy over many years. Honestly, this gift was a burden, so much that I can't even remember if I finally got rid of them or tucked them far enough out of sight that I've tried to forget. The ornaments never made me feel close to my godparent. Mostly confused when I was younger and irritated when I was older. Maybe bemused at some point?

So, yeah, this could be something fun for you that means absolutely nothing to these kids, and that even actively annoys them. You might also consider what kind of storage they'll need for them when they're a new adult and maybe won't have space for this collection (at college or living with roommates). Will the parents be able to hang onto the collection for them? Do you have any expectations about how the kids will display or use the collection? Because that could also be a burden for them.

My godparent also made me a homemade Christmas stocking that I absolutely adore and treasure, by the way. I'm not a person without sentiment. I'm just not sure we should choose a collectible for someone else.
posted by bluedaisy at 1:38 PM on April 15 [9 favorites]

What is your niece into right now? There are some fun ideas already with holiday ornaments or spoons or thimbles, but as someone that has a LOT of stuff, I can only imagine something big being.. cumbersome in the early years of living on one's own. I really do love the picture idea as it's something you can take out a whole book and look together every time you add a new one, and shouldn't take too much space.

What about a small wooden box, decorated, but each year, you give them something small to put in to remind them of the year... maybe a small dinosaur if you both really loved the museum trip that year, or a ticket stub if you went to a concert, etc, etc... same thing as above, you'd get to open it up each year and reshare those memories.
posted by niteHawk at 1:44 PM on April 15

I'm seconding the tools recommendation, and wormtales has it right: mending/sewing materials

10 yrs is a bit young for this interest to emerge, but my niece was in her later teens when she began to pick up used clothing for customization projects. She is a young woman who makes a lot of her own stuff now and it has really developed into her own style, so cool!

personally I'd avoid getting her started on collections of things

an excellent backpack is worth considering, if her current bags/backpack are kind of random and "just there"

is your niece showing signs of making/creating in any area? if storytelling and illustration are possible interests, I think it's worth checking out Lynda Barry for some wonderful resources, there are two titles that are specifically related to the creative process.. a bit old for 10, but just, especially if your niece is a little beyond her peer group in that way

a pair of socks each year. we need to wear socks and really cool, good quality socks are great. my partner appreciates good materials and nice prints and ethically sourced, it's easy to buy groovy socks but a little more effort to check all the boxes

good luck, Auntie!
posted by elkevelvet at 2:10 PM on April 15 [2 favorites]

Please don't assume any girl, even a strongly feminine one, will love a charm bracelet.

In fact, for any of these, maybe ask the intended recipient before going all in.
posted by amtho at 2:15 PM on April 15 [11 favorites]

- A t-shirt from a band or musician that she loves
- starting a tool kid, start with needle nose pliers because there is so much you can do with them (make jewelry, make electronics, fix glasses)
- A book about a person that age
- start collecting good camping equipment

- But my truest realest most hoped for present for you and this kid is the gift of TIME from an adult who cares about them so much that for the child's birthday they get one-on-one time doing what the kid picks and wants to do, listening to the kid talk about whatever, making connections and memories (cat cafe, arcade, afternoon tea, bowling, picnic, game night, special sleep over, brunch with mocktails, special swimming pool with slides, museum, etc). Take a picture and that will be the tradition. Then the kid can be their full self each time!
posted by mutt.cyberspace at 2:37 PM on April 15 [8 favorites]

Art supplies are valuable, not cumbersome and will be consumed (that is, she won't still be carting them around through multiple house moves post-college).

At 10 I remember coveting one of the BIG Crayola crayon boxes with all the colours including metallics and random shit like "burnt sienna". But I was a kid who enjoyed drawing. What does this kid enjoy?

Sewing or knitting/crochet supplies, or embroidery, will work if she's into that, or has expressed interest.

Maybe an age-appropriate book of poems every year? and ask her to record herself reading her favourite one to you. Or ask her to choose one and set it to music if she's musical. That way you'll have a record of her growing up too.
posted by Pallas Athena at 3:03 PM on April 15 [2 favorites]

A reasonably priced electric guitar + amp combo, and the next birthdays effects pedals. You can get her a better guitar and/or a nice tube-amp for some special occasion and a top-end digital multieffects for her graduation.
posted by signal at 3:48 PM on April 15 [2 favorites]

My in-laws give soccer jerseys and nice winter jackets to the niblings every winter. The whole family is very into soccer, so the jerseys are a nice family thing.

But honestly the nice winter jackets (with gift receipt so they can exchange it for a better size or color at REI or wherever) are the most appreciated. Especially from ages 10-18, that's a lot of growing in size and developing one's aesthetic and fashion style. It's not a collectable, but it is practical.

This idea is a combo gift of time and presents, but if you are able to physically be present with the kid, go to a bookstore with them and tell them they can pick any two or three books or whatever number you are comfortable with. I have done this with friends' kids and it's fun! I still remember my dad's friend who took me to a used bookstore and said - whatever you want! Luckily used book prices were low and I was not a complete monster (I picked 8 books I think). Re: classics, eh, so many people use e-readers and those are also super available via libraries, it will feel like homework I think.
posted by spamandkimchi at 5:43 PM on April 15 [1 favorite]

Similar to the framed photo idea, what about a photo book? You could start with "The First 10 Years" and do comparison photos of yourself and your sibling at various ages and the child. Keep the same format and some of the same pictures for your next niblings 10th birthday.

Subsequent years could be family tree/genealogy oriented or reviews of past years events. It would be fun to do comparisons some years, like when they are 15 make a book of all the family freshman photos you can find.

Alphabet is another theme. A is for Aunt )name). B is for Uncle Ben you get your brains from him. etc
posted by MadMadam at 7:43 PM on April 15

At age 10 I didn't want anything but more Breyer horses, but that definitely wasn't true of me at 18! You change a lot in that time. So maybe don't worry about a consistent theme or collection, and aim for a special experience each year. If having something tangible is important, let her pick whatever that is from the place you go..a collectible or book or goofy souvenir hat or whatever.
posted by emjaybee at 9:07 PM on April 15 [2 favorites]

Honestly, this question is more about you than the recipient, since you’ve offered nothing about their interests. Which is fine, but know what you’re trying to do here, foist some theme upon someone based on the crowd rather than the kid.

Much like your spoons, kid may not GAF until later, if ever. So basically you’re setting out to give eyerollers for the next 10 years this person may appreciate when they’re 30.

I appreciate this plan, kids don’t need more random crap or gift cards…but 10 yr old not really set up to appreciate this unless based on them, and even if it was, the annual thing based on 10 yr old interest not likely to match 16yr old interest down the line.

So, start building their Zombie Apocolypse survival kit year by year with various age appropriate items until the set is complete at 18 with the shotgun or whatever. But also, you know, include 20 bucks with a nice story about this year’s gift and the suggestion they either spend it on what they really want, or supplement the cache for the Zombie Apocalypse.

Be the weirdo, but stick the cash in there so you’re not seen as the clueless weirdo.
posted by ixipkcams at 9:20 PM on April 15 [5 favorites]

I am sixty, and I still have a water color case from a huge box of high-end art supplies my godmother gave med when I was seven or eight. The case also had oil crayons, colored pencils, normal pencils in various levels of softness, good paper and sharpeners for the pencils. I loved that gift, and it would have been lovely if she had replenished it every year. At this point, I mostly keep the watercolors for sentimental reasons, I have several other cases with a more personal selection of colors. But the point was that these were professional-grade colors and before computers I could use them at art school and later for work.
As a child, working with quality colors instead of supermarket colors makes a huge difference.
posted by mumimor at 10:26 PM on April 15 [5 favorites]

My kid's turning nine soon and I'm reasonably sure that if I did tiny blown glass figurines, for example, they'd still adore them for at least a couple of years. Or more carved pendants, or neat little rocks. So maybe "tiny special things," as a class? That's just my kid of course but I guess I'm saying I wouldn't rule out there being an answer to this. And I say that despite having been pushed to "collect" unique salt and pepper shakers as a kid just so a relative would have something to give me regularly. Why "books" wasn't a sufficient answer in my case, I don't know. I do like the suggestion of an annual used bookstore shopping spree, since that takes the pressure off of any given pick and they're already not in perfect condition, plus during years the kid isn't into it, it wouldn't leave an obvious gap in a set.
posted by teremala at 4:43 AM on April 16 [1 favorite]

What about paying for lessons every year in something she's interested in? It could be the same thing every year or a different thing. it might spark something she loves for the rest of her life, but even if it doesn't, it could give her quite a range of tools/skills she's dabbled in.
posted by tavegyl at 4:49 AM on April 16 [6 favorites]

My grandmother was a collector and really wanted to give me collector things (china figurines, charms, dolls), and absolutely none of it stuck into adulthood, although I did enjoy them at the time. So I'm a champion of "give kids something they'll enjoy at the time." It's just hard to predict what will stick. For example, even as an extremely bookish kid, there are I think 2 books in my collection now that were childhood gifts, and another 1 or 2 at most I wish I still had, and none of them were a set, just nice editions of books I enjoyed.

There are a few classes of things I would've used as a kid that would've stood a fighting chance of surviving all of my various moves in adulthood: good-quality crafting tools (embroidery and sewing, in my case), neat little boxes or containers, and cookbooks (or at least recipes from the cookbooks). I don't know that any of them would've necessarily been easy to predict when I was 10, but I would've gotten plenty of use from them at the time, and they ended up being lasting enjoyments.
posted by EvaDestruction at 7:59 AM on April 16

So many ideas here and so much is very dependent on the person. When my mother's grandchildren turned 10 (about when it gets harder to choose gifts), she would make a date for lunch with them. They picked the restaurant. Then they went on a shopping trip with a budget (maybe $50) and they got to pick out their own gift. My mother is gone now, but my daughter who is 26 (and only got about 4 of these outings), still talks about how fun it was. No siblings or cousins to share grandmother and a gift she really wanted (and still has today even if it is outdated, like the little CD player).
posted by maxg94 at 10:39 AM on April 16 [1 favorite]

I love the toolbox idea. Give them a toolbox with a nice note inside first, and if the gift seems to be appreciated, you can add a new tool every year. Check out Trusco cantilevered toolboxes. The cool thing about a nice toolbox like this is that no matter what they're into — drawing, crafting, calligraphy, makeup, guitar pedals, jewelry, lego, bike repair — they're gonna find a use for the toolbox.
posted by sportbucket at 1:30 PM on April 16 [1 favorite]

Last month was my daughter's tenth birthday. She can hardly pass a bookstore without stopping to browse—I wanted to give her a special gift that connected with her love for literature. I chose a book nook kit, a little DIY project that would allow her to create a miniature scene right out of the magical worlds she's always reading about.
I bought it in this store, book nook kits there are many types, but the shipping time is long, it took me 14 days to receive it!
posted by yuanyuanzi at 7:14 PM on May 14