Shape wear for mom pooch

April 14, 2024 6:26 AM

I an looking for shape wear or clothing styles to take attention away from a mom pooch that makes me look early second trimester.

I am two years post-partum. I had diastisis recti of 1-2 inches (abdominal separation). I did some PT. I have also done programs like Every Mother and Mommastrong (not finished with the former). I have been doing barre classes twice per week the last six months or so. I feel strong! But the "pooch" from the abdominal separation remains. It hangs over jeans and makes t-shirts look poochy. I am starting to try to accept that this may never change, despite a healthy diet and strength training. The rest of my body is fairly strong and I have a slender build. This makes the pooch more noticeable perhaps. I would like to find shapewear that could comoflauge the pooch a little so I could wear dresses or jeans without looking slightly pregnant. Or just find other clothes that look good. Because I am on the small to medium side of things, sometimes the oversize looks just swallow me in a not attractive way. Do you have suggestions of what to wear (outside or underneath clothes)? I am proud of my body (growing a person and getting physically strong in other ways) and don't want to dwell on this any longer. I watched my parents dwell in diet culture in the 90s and I don't want my kid to see me as critical of my bod. I just want to find styles for the new body and embrace it. Thanks.

posted by Sophiaverde to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (10 answers total)

I could have written this question too! The great thing about a belly pooch in 2024 is that ultra-high waisted pants are in style, easy to find, and do a great job of pulling it in. Try Old Navy High Waisted Pixie pants - I just got a pair of the wide-leg ones and I am SHOCKED how flattering and stylish they are. They're comfy, stretchy, look polished, and look WAY more high-end than $50! The photos on the Old Navy website don't do these pants justice, seriously try them. Old Navy does Petite length, and they also have slim leg and straight leg versions but the wide leg is what's in style now. The cute easy mom outfit now is to wear them with a jean jacket, an interesting t-shirt, and very clean white skate sneakers like Adidas, Vejas, Vans, or platform Converse, and you're good to go.

Gap and Old Navy also have high-waisted jeans that suck in a pooch really well.

For shapewear, I swear by what I call my "wrestling onesie" - the MiracleSuit Torsette. I've tried a lot of brands and this is the best, as soon as I tried it on I forgave the $150 pricetag and bought several. Honestly, don't even bother with the cheaper ones, this one is amazing. It has shoulder straps so it doesn't roll down and create a muffin top. Shoulder straps are KEY for comfort. The panelled front sucks in your belly really well, and because it has shoulder straps instead of a waist band it doesn't roll down, cut into your stomach, or bind. The longer legs also mean you don't get a chub band from elastic on the thighs or bum cheeks. You can also wear any bra you want and it won't compress / flatten your bust. There's even a little bit of boning in the back to prevent back rolls. For how well they compress, they're quite comfy. For peeing there's an envelope-style slit in the crotch, so with some practice, you can hold it open and pee without getting it wet. I recommend wearing it no underwear for ease in that department (that's why I bought a few). I don't wear them every day, only with more fitted outfits like dresses. But man what a difference!

One tip - I cut the thigh bands off of one of my shapewear suits (cheaper model thank goodness), to wear with a short dress - do NOT do that, the thighs will never stay down again, they'll roll up annoyingly and create visible unflattering chub bands on your legs.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 6:42 AM on April 14 [8 favorites]

My baby was very big, and my skin tore so much that it never recovered, plus a surgical delivery, so I have a pannicula, a fold of excess skin of which I am really self-conscious. I wear these panties that keep it from juggling, are comfortable. If you dry them on a rack or towel rod, they will last 3x longer. I put them in the washer, just not the dryer.
posted by theora55 at 10:29 AM on April 14 [1 favorite]

Higher waist jeans and skirts for sure. Stylish and flattering, and so much more comfortable. Try various sizes because you might not be the same size you’re used to in a lower rise.

Do you wear belts? I used to see them as extraneous but now I’m a convert. Not only do they create a waist visually, they hold your waistband exactly where you want it so that the jeans that held you in at 8 AM don’t slide down below your belly by 5 PM.

Now that the weather is warming up, I love dresses as daily wear. If it’s been a while, try a bunch of styles to see what works for your body, and once you find something that looks good, buy a bunch. It’s the easiest outfit there is, will always drape over a belly if it fits correctly, and always looks put- together.

I will also say that clothes made with good weighty natural fibers are worth the expense. Today’s super thin clingy synthetic blend tees give everyone a pooch. But a nice thick 100% cotton won’t get sucked into your belly button or look puckery and lumpy after the first wash.
posted by kapers at 10:47 AM on April 14

I also want to say that I’ve never found shapewear to be the solution because for every problem it solves, it creates a new one (like flattening my butt or suffocating my crotch or creating a thigh bulge or moving a muffin top higher.) I’d much rather wear a higher rise and a belt than uncomfy spanx under jeans that don’t work for my body.
posted by kapers at 10:52 AM on April 14

I wanted to suggest not shapewear, but just trying new and different styles of underwear than you normally wear. If you're near a department store or even a big box store, buy one pair of several different styles of higher rise underwear, and perhaps in a slightly larger size than you'd normally wear. They don't have to be any special kind of fabric, just high enough to go over the spot that troubles you. And sizing up a bit in underwear can be good, too.
posted by bluedaisy at 11:35 AM on April 14 [1 favorite]

I don't have specific style recommendations but I will say that post-childbearing, I had to take a good chunk of time in changerooms trying on a wide variety of clothes to reset my sense of what looks good on me. Some of it, frankly, in frustration, but it got better. So I would encourage trying to find the time to do that, and give it a bit of time to reset your tastes.

Also echoing that structured or thicker fabrics and dresses have been things I've gravitated to.
posted by warriorqueen at 11:53 AM on April 14

This was also me 5 years ago! Nthing the high-waisted (not 'ribcage' if you're short like me, just slightly higher-waisted) jeans/trousers etc. Total gamechanger. Also I love t-shirt dresses (any length) that just skim over that area but still feel fitted and comfortable at the top. Also since you say you're also S/M in size (not sure of height - I'm 5'4") something that really surprised me is cropped/boxy t-shirts. I have a smaller chest but they just kinda hang off from there and then stop at the (high-waisted) waistband, giving me some shape? Anyway, it works!

Also, on the underwear front, these knickers are great 'in-between' in that they're not shapewear, just super comfy, good coverage and a feeling of just being a little 'held-in' with the waistband.

If it's an option for you financially, I would also recommend hiring a stylist for a shopping trip or two. As a treat to myself, I found a local woman around my age, who also had had kids so knew what I was talking about and she helped me just dress my new body (and seriously, my entirely shape had changed - wider rib cage, more curve in spine, pear-shaped) and anyway she did a great job getting me to try things on I would never have considered before. It was so worth it for my confidence and also financially because I stopped buying things that were unflattering and/or I never wore.

There's also some great style blogs about. I'm not particularly into 'fashion' fashion but I like wearsmymoney - she's UK based and in her late 40s/early 50s maybe but she wears everyday, high street stuff with some elevated pieces but nothing ridiculous - just really helpful to see how it can be done.
posted by atlantica at 1:10 PM on April 14

I pretty much live in Lane Bryant, so if you're in that size range, the LIVI Active bottoms are mostly high-waisted and function like light shapewear around the stomach. I use them as shapewear under dresses, actually.
posted by limeonaire at 2:02 PM on April 14

hah, jiggling, not juggling.
posted by theora55 at 7:18 PM on April 14

Response by poster: Thanks everyone! I will be trying out these suggestions and hopefully enjoying my summer wardrobe for the first time in years!
posted by Sophiaverde at 9:18 AM on April 15